I'd Forgotten....

...how well porn and sex go together sometimes.

Ancient Roman Sprintiae

‘A spintria (plural, spintriae ) is a Romantoken, possibly for use in brothels, usually depicting sexual acts or symbols.

‘They may have been used to pay prostitutes, who at times spoke a different language. While this is subject to argument, the numbers on them line up with known prices for Roman prostitutes.

There were usually struck from brass or bronze, and were little smaller than a U.S. quarter. The represented erotic plot was suitable for the provided services. “

- Wikipedia

“I had this client the other night. He’s been here once before....."

“I had this client the other night. He’s been here once before. He’s youngish, late twenties, early thirties, and he comes late at night. He wants me to list all the men I saw that night and what I did with them. It doesn’t matter if he’s into what I did to them, his focus is on the sheer volume - not the specifics. His fetish is the fact that he’s paying me. He wants me to list the clients I saw, tell him how many, how old they were, how much money they gave me. He asked me how old I was. “Twenty-two,” he repeated. “I get to buy twenty-two.” I was on the verge of telling him that, actually, no, you get to buy a specific service with a twenty-two year old for an allotted amount of time, but he sensed my loathing and semi-corrected himself by tacking on a ‘half an hour.’ He disclosed to me that he was a writer. He’d been working on a semi-autobiographical novel about his ‘wacky adventures’ in college. He went to Journalism grad school at Harvard (I think 40% of my clients are Harvard boys, eck). I had this flash of him as a doughy faced college kid; him on his friend’s yacht, taking weekend flights to South America to sex tour Brazil. Did his wacky adventures include going to see a twenty-two year old sensual masseuse? Something clicked inside my brain and I realized just how much I hated this man I was slowly jerking off. That asshole, using his fucking privilege to write for Newsweek and the AP and to come get a massage from me, while he aspired to write for the neo-liberal hole that is the Economist. In my mind, I made a pact with him. If he was going to write about this I was going to write about it, too. And if he published it, I would get it published and use his real fucking name. I finished up and told him he should keep his cum. He was confused. “You know, you should keep it. Like a souvenir or a memento. You paid a lot of money for that sperm. It’s worth something now. 160 dollars, actually.””

- Favoured Strangers: On Thinking Yourself a Tourist: Sex Work & Class  (via lots of smart folks)

Dont lick the pole.

Hanging on....
Barely, but I'm doing it!
We found put last night that the phone at the salon phone had been plugged into the wrong jack for the past week (we unplugged it when we did the floors), and we had a big "oh shit" moment, but also a sigh of relief. We had had no idea why no one had been calling and the phone rang and rang and rang today, so problem solved.


I took a good chunk of the day off yesterday to go out to an industrial area behind LAX, where a huge photographic printing press is located. They do most of the printing you see for building wraps, advertisements, movie posters, you name it they do it. Behind their practically non existent storefront was a huge warehouse with printers the size of a bus and a mini factory.
I was there with my friend/artist/former commune compadre, Calethia.  We already use one of her pieces for our logo, and shes letting us use her art in the salon. We met down at the printers to look at our option for materials, finishes, etc.
Right now, these are the two pieces we're using. They will be BIG, HUGE, MAMMOTH! GO BIG OR GO HOME!!!!
Sorry, Im excited.

This will be the biggest piece, coming in at around the 70 inch range:

This next piece will be smaller and go in our all black shampoo room:

Since we had finally managed to meet down there after weeks of trying (we are both a combination of busy and lazy), we wanted to draw out it out and go have a bite/drink. Like I said, we were behind the airport on 104th street, in an industrial but deserted area. In Inglewood. 

I had passed a random restaurant with vintage planes in front of it called the "Proud Bird" and suggested we round the corner and check it out. To our surprise it was an upscale restaurant with a full on brunch happening, and men in suits milling about. It was super bright, with adjoining banquet halls that looked primed for corporate dinner where they hand out plastic awards.

It was way too sunny. 

I almost never use my phone to find restaurants, but I forget that's what its for! So I typed in bar, and it directed us a little further down the street to the "wild goose". I have no idea what it is with the bird names, but I'm guessing its airport related.

We pulled into the parking lot and were alerted by the faded sign that while this contained a bar, it was actually a strip club.

 "Are we doing this?" she asked. 

"The worlds most beautiful girls? Damn right we are." I said.

Calethia had a little carpetbagger suitcase with her that contained her laptop. When we walked in there was someone  checking IDs (maybe that's strip club law? There certainly weren't people piling in).

The security guy looked down at her suitcase, then back up at her and asked if she was auditioning.

Double poles for an ebony and ivory joint slidedown!

We walked in and the place was surprisingly big, just one big room with a bar on one side, stage on the other, and about five people inside total. It was dark as hell, and completely perfect. We ordered drinks from the young and depressed bartender who seemed to hate his life, and took a seat far from everyone in a booth by the stage. 

And what a stage. Gold lame curtains from the 70's red and green spot lights casting a glow that reminded me of something out of goodfellas or Casino, and two stripper poles to nowhere, which disappeared into jagged holes in the drop ceiling.

Golden.

Unfortunately, a jukebox filled with Journey and other hits was our only entertainment. I don't think dances started till 4pm, which, according to all the one star reviews on Yelp, was our loss.

Upon leaving, I noticed this stained glass window outside.

Stained glass just reeks of class, don't you think?

Finished the day of trying out Trader Joes Baby Back Ribs last night. 15 minutes in the oven, and absolutely ACES. Fall off the bone goodness. $9.99, and highly recommended!:

Traffic Cops Gone Wild!

According to an investigation by NBC4, two uniformed LADOT traffic appeared in a porn video while on the clock. And even after their boss found out about it, they kept their jobs. The city's parking enforcement chief Jimmy Price seems to agree it's reprehensible but says he wasn't sure of the identities of the two officers until recently, though that's not really what NBC4 found.

In the movie, available on a paid subscription website, a sexually adventurous young lady romps around town. She comes into contact with a uniformed LADOT cop who "spanks her and fondles her breasts"; a second LADOT officer gets "spanked" by the woman and then takes her into his police car (!) and allows her to pleasure herself.

An internal February memo to his superiors and subordinates, Price referenced an employee's behavior that could be categorized as misconduct. The officers weren't disciplined until yesterday when they were put on leave amid an investigation, according to the Los Angeles Times. Price told NBCLA that back in February he wasn't sure who the specific officers in the porn were, but reports from other LADOT employees seem to dispute that. LADOT general manager Amir Sedadi called the officers' behavior "disgusting," while City Councilman Bill Rosendahl said he was "appalled and outraged."
· City Workers Make Porn [NBC4LA]
· LA Investigating Porn Shoot Allegedly Involving Officers [LA Times]

My New Hero.

Apparently at USC, they have run out of places to bone--these kids were caught (on camera) doing it on the roof of the 12-story Waite Phillips Hall for some reason. The photos were first posted online on Saturday night, according to an article in the Daily Trojan, and have already gotten the man in the photos suspended from his fraternity, Kappa Sigma. Waite Phillips Hall was designed by Edward D. Stone Associates and built in 1968, and appears in "An Architectural Guidebook to Los Angeles."  Here's the entire photo set, for all you voyuers.




Also unrelated, but since his penis is blocked out of the photos, you can probably guess his size by using this newfound handy dandy chart to penis size by country. Especially helpful when planning your next vacation.

Respect You Elders.

For years, a Tokyo grandfather kept a dirty little secret from his family. Longtime travel agent Shigeo Tokuda, who resembles countless older men who ride the Tokyo subway each day, admitted to his wife and daughter that he sometimes performed cameos in small-budget films.

Since he was “discovered” in 1996, Tokuda has emerged as a major player in Japan’s emerging adult movie genre known as “elder porn.” He says he has appeared in more than 350 films such as “Prohibited Nursing” and “Maniac Training of Lolitas.”

When Looking For Good Sex Music....

.....Make a Morcheeba station on Pandora.com. Never fails.